Samantha wiped a tear from the corner of her eye, and looked again at Raven. No. She saw through Raven, as if Raven were somehow transparent. There and not there. She shook her head and squeezed her eyes again thinking perhaps she was having a tear-blurred vision problem, but when she refocused again Raven looked shimmer-y and sheer.
"Are you ok, Raven?" Samantha took a step toward her and reached out just in time to catch the iced tea glass as it slipped out of her hand.
"Lucas!" She shouted for his help-a twist of fear making her own voice sound shrill and disembodied to her own ears.
"What happened?"
"I'm not sure, we were both laughing a minute ago and then she sort of ... faded?" Samantha was searching for the right words, as they stood up on either side of her and started walking back inside.
"She has episodes like this sometimes, let's get her lying down on the couch and see if this one passes quickly."
He sounded matter-of-fact, and calm, which helped ease Samantha's jangled nerves a bit.
"Do the episodes usually pass quickly?" She felt a pang of guilt, because asking had more to do with a sudden fear that she might one day have such episodes herself. It was impossible to ask Raven anything just now, and she hoped Lucas might know or remember a little from his time living with her.
"It depends. I can't say I know on what, but some are over in a matter of minutes, while there was one that had me worried because she was unreachable for ten hours." He shrugged. "All I try to do is make sure she's comfortable." He covered Raven with a blanket from the back of the couch, and nestled her head gently on a pillow before returning his attention to Samantha. She looked a little pale, but otherwise strong. There was still something that had changed since they arrived, but he couldn't quite sniff it out. "What were you two talking about just before she faded?"
Samantha shook herself out of her unfocused gaze and tried to find a way to summarize. She didn't want to share everything with him, she would feel almost naked if she tried. But she also couldn't shut him out completely. "We were discussing masks people wear. Um, it's kind of personal actually. But it was so helpful and thought-provoking for me. I'm afraid I have more questions now than when I started, but she told me that might happen."
Lucas nodded, and said "You never have to share more than you feel comfortable. I understand. I often wonder where she is when she goes into her episode. Is she deep inside herself, does she send her spirit walking in our physical realm somewhere, or is it a different plane of existence altogether?" His questions were obviously rhetorical, but Samantha enjoyed hearing him articulate her own thoughts almost exactly.
They locked eyes for a moment, and a shiver ran down her spine. She felt his lips on hers in a future flash of impossible but so certain fore-knowledge, and her cheeks blushed a deep red. She broke away from their gaze first, and he was left wondering what he had missed--again.
Showing posts with label Second Sight. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Second Sight. Show all posts
Friday, May 30, 2014
Wednesday, May 21, 2014
Second Sight (Porch chat continued)
Raven sipped her tea quietly while Samantha pondered the masks. A Dark cloud passed over her forehead in thought, but Samantha was preoccupied with her own questions so she missed it.
Samantha had been chewing the inside of her cheek, wishing she wasn't filled with even more questions than before.
"I don't want to sound naive or dumb...but if I am not aware of a mask, how can I remove it?"
Raven smiled.
"There is no question that could make you seem dumb or naive, except perhaps the one you choose not to ask for fear of damaging your image. Do you see? Already your fear of judgment has nearly stopped you from asking the next thing. Do you know something else? All that judgment is In Your Own Head. That's right. Before I can begin to answer your question I must address the way you even posed the question. Perhaps by unraveling that, we will even get one step or all the way closer to answering your thought about masks."
Samantha's brow furrowed.
"I can't imagine ALL judgment is in my head. That can't be right. I know I judge others at times, even though I mean well and I assume others do the same as I do. I've certainly rolled my eyes internally and when I was younger externally when someone was asking a question that seemed obvious to me."
"You may, but Let me ask you something. Have there been times when you asked a question and felt judged, and other times when you asked a question and saw judgment but didn't care?"
"Well of course, sometimes the person judging me is someone I don't necessarily respect or care about. In that case I could not care less what their opinion of me is."
"That's it. Right there. You allow someone else's opinion of you or your question to matter, have relevance, have meaning. You Allow or disallow. So any judgment you feel was begun in your own mind...whether the thought sprung from your mind itself or you chose to accept or invite someone else's thought in and give it significance, weight, and meaning."
Samantha took a sip of her iced tea, and nibbled on her straw.
"Okay, let's set aside the way I posed the question though. I am still confused about how to remove a mask I am blind to seeing. How can I be expected to get rid of something so unconscious?"
Raven grimaced.
"Child, you are still caught up in someone else's expectations. Who are you trying to please?"
Samantha was getting frustrated.
"Are you toying with me?"
"Not in the slightest. This is actually more relevant to your question than you realise, but you are too close to it yourself to see that. Have you ever known someone who dated the wrong person, but you couldn't tell them until after the relationship ended? What do they always say? 'Why didn't you tell me?' And what is your response, usually? 'You would not have listened.' And you would be right. Samantha, you came to me to learn. You are asking me about Removing a mask, but everything you are saying is through the filter of still wearing one. Presently, you frame each question innocently in your habit. Or maybe it isn't so innocent. Maybe it is possible for you to begin to change your language and your perception may also change with more awareness of word choice. Wake Up! Waking up is not comfortable. Do not apologise for your questions to me ever again. But more importantly, Do not worry about my approval! Do not change your approach to please me or any other audience. Your mask is people-pleasing. If I simply tell you how to change, you have trapped yourself into merely pleasing a new entity outside yourself. This is a path to misery. You can not be held responsible by anyone for someone else's emotional state."
Samantha sat blinking, feeling the words almost physically assault her.
"I want to take off the mask...I just don't know how."
"Bullshit. You are the only one who does know how, but you don't have the courage to do it." Raven's voice was quiet, but firm.
Samantha wasn't even sure anymore if she was angry, annoyed, frustrated, or feeling helpless to change
She stood up, adrenaline pumping. She stalked to the edge of the porch and set her glass down on the ledge. Her eyes weren't even focusing on the lawn or street, and there were little flashing spots at the edges of her peripheral vision. Who was this woman, and how dare she challenge her very way of being? People-pleasing? What does she know, anyway? At work Samantha had been so strong, she'd been asked to fire someone, which had been hard for her, but even as she tried to come up with that example she knew Raven would ferret out that she had done it to please her bosses and fulfill her duties. Her white hot rage began to mellow upon that realisation. Maybe she was prone to people-pleasing. Now what? She turned on her heel and stared at Raven.
"Now what? Any impulse I have, I have to pause and ask myself who I'm trying to please? Every move I make, I should live with second guessing my motivations like some kind of ball and chain?"
"If that's what taking off your mask involves, then I assume it will be temporary. I see you don't have the patience for that so it shouldn't take long for you to come up with an alternate approach." Raven's lips twitched at the edges of a smile, and her eyes twinkled mischievously.
Samantha caught sight of herself in this moment, and saw that right now she was being her own authentic self without caring about anyone else's opinion. It felt free, unfettered, nothing resembling a ball and chain, no second guessing, no apologizing for who she was or what she said or felt.
She grinned back at Raven, and then they both chuckled, and the laughter caught its own momentum, and their eyes lit and twinkled and they laughed until tears squeezed out of the corners of their eyes.
Samantha had been chewing the inside of her cheek, wishing she wasn't filled with even more questions than before.
"I don't want to sound naive or dumb...but if I am not aware of a mask, how can I remove it?"
Raven smiled.
"There is no question that could make you seem dumb or naive, except perhaps the one you choose not to ask for fear of damaging your image. Do you see? Already your fear of judgment has nearly stopped you from asking the next thing. Do you know something else? All that judgment is In Your Own Head. That's right. Before I can begin to answer your question I must address the way you even posed the question. Perhaps by unraveling that, we will even get one step or all the way closer to answering your thought about masks."
Samantha's brow furrowed.
"I can't imagine ALL judgment is in my head. That can't be right. I know I judge others at times, even though I mean well and I assume others do the same as I do. I've certainly rolled my eyes internally and when I was younger externally when someone was asking a question that seemed obvious to me."
"You may, but Let me ask you something. Have there been times when you asked a question and felt judged, and other times when you asked a question and saw judgment but didn't care?"
"Well of course, sometimes the person judging me is someone I don't necessarily respect or care about. In that case I could not care less what their opinion of me is."
"That's it. Right there. You allow someone else's opinion of you or your question to matter, have relevance, have meaning. You Allow or disallow. So any judgment you feel was begun in your own mind...whether the thought sprung from your mind itself or you chose to accept or invite someone else's thought in and give it significance, weight, and meaning."
Samantha took a sip of her iced tea, and nibbled on her straw.
"Okay, let's set aside the way I posed the question though. I am still confused about how to remove a mask I am blind to seeing. How can I be expected to get rid of something so unconscious?"
Raven grimaced.
"Child, you are still caught up in someone else's expectations. Who are you trying to please?"
Samantha was getting frustrated.
"Are you toying with me?"
"Not in the slightest. This is actually more relevant to your question than you realise, but you are too close to it yourself to see that. Have you ever known someone who dated the wrong person, but you couldn't tell them until after the relationship ended? What do they always say? 'Why didn't you tell me?' And what is your response, usually? 'You would not have listened.' And you would be right. Samantha, you came to me to learn. You are asking me about Removing a mask, but everything you are saying is through the filter of still wearing one. Presently, you frame each question innocently in your habit. Or maybe it isn't so innocent. Maybe it is possible for you to begin to change your language and your perception may also change with more awareness of word choice. Wake Up! Waking up is not comfortable. Do not apologise for your questions to me ever again. But more importantly, Do not worry about my approval! Do not change your approach to please me or any other audience. Your mask is people-pleasing. If I simply tell you how to change, you have trapped yourself into merely pleasing a new entity outside yourself. This is a path to misery. You can not be held responsible by anyone for someone else's emotional state."
Samantha sat blinking, feeling the words almost physically assault her.
"I want to take off the mask...I just don't know how."
"Bullshit. You are the only one who does know how, but you don't have the courage to do it." Raven's voice was quiet, but firm.
Samantha wasn't even sure anymore if she was angry, annoyed, frustrated, or feeling helpless to change
She stood up, adrenaline pumping. She stalked to the edge of the porch and set her glass down on the ledge. Her eyes weren't even focusing on the lawn or street, and there were little flashing spots at the edges of her peripheral vision. Who was this woman, and how dare she challenge her very way of being? People-pleasing? What does she know, anyway? At work Samantha had been so strong, she'd been asked to fire someone, which had been hard for her, but even as she tried to come up with that example she knew Raven would ferret out that she had done it to please her bosses and fulfill her duties. Her white hot rage began to mellow upon that realisation. Maybe she was prone to people-pleasing. Now what? She turned on her heel and stared at Raven.
"Now what? Any impulse I have, I have to pause and ask myself who I'm trying to please? Every move I make, I should live with second guessing my motivations like some kind of ball and chain?"
"If that's what taking off your mask involves, then I assume it will be temporary. I see you don't have the patience for that so it shouldn't take long for you to come up with an alternate approach." Raven's lips twitched at the edges of a smile, and her eyes twinkled mischievously.
Samantha caught sight of herself in this moment, and saw that right now she was being her own authentic self without caring about anyone else's opinion. It felt free, unfettered, nothing resembling a ball and chain, no second guessing, no apologizing for who she was or what she said or felt.
She grinned back at Raven, and then they both chuckled, and the laughter caught its own momentum, and their eyes lit and twinkled and they laughed until tears squeezed out of the corners of their eyes.
Sunday, May 18, 2014
Second Sight (Raven)
"Come in, sit down, and let me get you something to eat!" Raven was petite, businesslike and assertive. She moved and talked in ways that left little doubt as to who was in charge. Her manner was friendly, but also no-nonsense.
Lucas glanced sideways at Samantha, a little worried she might not respond so well to Raven. Samantha's eyes glinted, and she smiled at Lucas as if to say "I see what you mean." It seemed some of his stories had prepared her a little for Raven.
Samantha tried to find a time to ask a question, but Raven kept up a light patter about what kind of lunch meat they wanted on which kind of bread, asking in successive either or questions whether they wanted wheat or rye, toasted or not, Swiss cheese or no cheese, etc and Samantha decided to allow Raven to steer the lunchtime conversation. She hadn't been able to really eat a proper breakfast with her stomach in knots of anticipation and excitement, and enjoyed her sandwich immensely side by side with Lucas. Raven bustled about in the kitchen while they ate on the island and then brought a tray with three tall glasses of iced tea.
"Now! Let me get a look at you two." She handed them each their iced teas, and took a long draw on her own straw as she gazed with unfocused eyes at alternately Samantha and then Lucas.
Samantha held her breath for a full thirty seconds, and then broke free and sipped her iced tea. She looked shyly back at Raven, and though her mind was full of questions she could not figure where to begin, and her mind drew a blank. Then she felt a tremor begin in her spine at about her mid-back and she didn't know what it was, and she closed her eyes and felt herself shaking uncontrollably. She felt joy, but she also felt tears rolling down her cheeks. With her eyes closed, an image still arrived in her mind's eye. An image of a strong woman, tall, slender, powerful and self-assured and somehow this woman was herself in another realm. And there was also Raven, but in another shape, not a bird, but a shaman like an old Indian man with a bird mask on, with rough leathery skin and joyful twinkling eyes and a tough exterior. She felt these two powerful beings square off, meet as equals, and nod to one another.
When she opened her eyes, Samantha was surprised to still be sitting upright at the island, holding her iced tea Lucas beside her. As though no time had passed, but eons stretched between the self that had sat down for lunch and the self that had lifted her glass to her lips, Samantha gazed fully upon Raven.
Raven looked her dead on, and then grunted.
"You need to stay with me tonight. Both of you can call in sick tomorrow, this is too important and it cannot wait."
Samantha had no intention to disagree. She needed answers more than her team needed her there tomorrow. She looked at Lucas, and his brow was wrinkled.
"Did I miss something?" He was looking from one to the other, and then settled on Samantha. Something had changed in her aspect. She had been so fragile, so vulnerable, so in need of rescuing ever since he'd met her. But now there was steel in her eyes, a strength he hadn't smelled in her before, and something...dangerous. He sniffed. "What just happened?"
Samantha was not sure she could put into words anyway, but she touched his arm in a reassuring gesture and said "I can't thank you enough for introducing us." Her eyes were shining, but clear.
"Lucas, be a dear and wash up while Samantha and I go chat for a few minutes." It wasn't a question, but he couldn't refuse her even if he wanted to.
"Alright Samantha, let's go sit on the front porch swing with our tea and get acquainted."
Samantha followed her, hope rising in her chest, and gratitude threatened to send fresh tears rolling down her cheeks. She dashed her fingers against the corners of her eyes and tried to pull herself together, tried to reconnect with that inner mystical woman she had just seen as some aspect of herself.
When they sat together for a few minutes neither one of them broke the silence. Samantha wasn't sure what she was waiting for, but it didn't feel right to speak yet. They sat, they sipped, they breathed. And then an avalanche of words that had been trapped in her somehow spilled forth.
"What did you see? Did you see the same things I saw? Does it mean something, oh well of course it must mean something somehow, but how on earth does one sort through and know with certainty the meaning not only of what I saw about myself, at least I think it was my self or an extension of myself or an aspect of my self, but not to mention of you or for that matter of Lucas or any of the other strange visions and impulses I've had!?" She paused to take a breath and then muttered "I don't know where to start or how this works, and I've been so lost and alone..." and she trailed off.
Raven glanced at her sideways.
"I remember what it was like at the beginning. I understand. Answers will come, but not fast enough. And some answers you won't like. And some you won't understand until many years later. But the fact is you are not alone. And you are stronger than you portray. Why do you act so weak? Is it so others around you are not threatened by your strength, or is it to allow them the role of hero? Either way that role no longer suits you. Can you let it go?"
Samantha was startled. She didn't think she acted weak. She was a leader at work. She was in charge of a department. But then she paused and reflected. Perhaps she allowed others to feel important because it puffed them up. Maybe she down-played her own importance at work so that others could shine. Why did she act weaker, pause longer, step back?
"I will need to think about that. I was not conscious I was doing that."
"That is the most dangerous mask we ever wear, dear. The one we forget is a mask. The one we mistake for our true selves."
Samantha sat with that in discomfort and in silence for a long time.
Lucas glanced sideways at Samantha, a little worried she might not respond so well to Raven. Samantha's eyes glinted, and she smiled at Lucas as if to say "I see what you mean." It seemed some of his stories had prepared her a little for Raven.
Samantha tried to find a time to ask a question, but Raven kept up a light patter about what kind of lunch meat they wanted on which kind of bread, asking in successive either or questions whether they wanted wheat or rye, toasted or not, Swiss cheese or no cheese, etc and Samantha decided to allow Raven to steer the lunchtime conversation. She hadn't been able to really eat a proper breakfast with her stomach in knots of anticipation and excitement, and enjoyed her sandwich immensely side by side with Lucas. Raven bustled about in the kitchen while they ate on the island and then brought a tray with three tall glasses of iced tea.
"Now! Let me get a look at you two." She handed them each their iced teas, and took a long draw on her own straw as she gazed with unfocused eyes at alternately Samantha and then Lucas.
Samantha held her breath for a full thirty seconds, and then broke free and sipped her iced tea. She looked shyly back at Raven, and though her mind was full of questions she could not figure where to begin, and her mind drew a blank. Then she felt a tremor begin in her spine at about her mid-back and she didn't know what it was, and she closed her eyes and felt herself shaking uncontrollably. She felt joy, but she also felt tears rolling down her cheeks. With her eyes closed, an image still arrived in her mind's eye. An image of a strong woman, tall, slender, powerful and self-assured and somehow this woman was herself in another realm. And there was also Raven, but in another shape, not a bird, but a shaman like an old Indian man with a bird mask on, with rough leathery skin and joyful twinkling eyes and a tough exterior. She felt these two powerful beings square off, meet as equals, and nod to one another.
When she opened her eyes, Samantha was surprised to still be sitting upright at the island, holding her iced tea Lucas beside her. As though no time had passed, but eons stretched between the self that had sat down for lunch and the self that had lifted her glass to her lips, Samantha gazed fully upon Raven.
Raven looked her dead on, and then grunted.
"You need to stay with me tonight. Both of you can call in sick tomorrow, this is too important and it cannot wait."
Samantha had no intention to disagree. She needed answers more than her team needed her there tomorrow. She looked at Lucas, and his brow was wrinkled.
"Did I miss something?" He was looking from one to the other, and then settled on Samantha. Something had changed in her aspect. She had been so fragile, so vulnerable, so in need of rescuing ever since he'd met her. But now there was steel in her eyes, a strength he hadn't smelled in her before, and something...dangerous. He sniffed. "What just happened?"
Samantha was not sure she could put into words anyway, but she touched his arm in a reassuring gesture and said "I can't thank you enough for introducing us." Her eyes were shining, but clear.
"Lucas, be a dear and wash up while Samantha and I go chat for a few minutes." It wasn't a question, but he couldn't refuse her even if he wanted to.
"Alright Samantha, let's go sit on the front porch swing with our tea and get acquainted."
Samantha followed her, hope rising in her chest, and gratitude threatened to send fresh tears rolling down her cheeks. She dashed her fingers against the corners of her eyes and tried to pull herself together, tried to reconnect with that inner mystical woman she had just seen as some aspect of herself.
When they sat together for a few minutes neither one of them broke the silence. Samantha wasn't sure what she was waiting for, but it didn't feel right to speak yet. They sat, they sipped, they breathed. And then an avalanche of words that had been trapped in her somehow spilled forth.
"What did you see? Did you see the same things I saw? Does it mean something, oh well of course it must mean something somehow, but how on earth does one sort through and know with certainty the meaning not only of what I saw about myself, at least I think it was my self or an extension of myself or an aspect of my self, but not to mention of you or for that matter of Lucas or any of the other strange visions and impulses I've had!?" She paused to take a breath and then muttered "I don't know where to start or how this works, and I've been so lost and alone..." and she trailed off.
Raven glanced at her sideways.
"I remember what it was like at the beginning. I understand. Answers will come, but not fast enough. And some answers you won't like. And some you won't understand until many years later. But the fact is you are not alone. And you are stronger than you portray. Why do you act so weak? Is it so others around you are not threatened by your strength, or is it to allow them the role of hero? Either way that role no longer suits you. Can you let it go?"
Samantha was startled. She didn't think she acted weak. She was a leader at work. She was in charge of a department. But then she paused and reflected. Perhaps she allowed others to feel important because it puffed them up. Maybe she down-played her own importance at work so that others could shine. Why did she act weaker, pause longer, step back?
"I will need to think about that. I was not conscious I was doing that."
"That is the most dangerous mask we ever wear, dear. The one we forget is a mask. The one we mistake for our true selves."
Samantha sat with that in discomfort and in silence for a long time.
Sunday, May 4, 2014
Second Sight (On the way to meet Raven)
Lucas swung his car around the little cul-de-sac and debated whether to honk his horn, or walk to the door. His moment of hesitation earned him a moment to breathe and collect his thoughts in preparation for a two hour drive with Samantha to a potentially disappointing meeting with Raven. His phone call with Raven had been short and to the point, and her response had been a simple invitation. Samantha had sounded nervous and giddy on the phone and he was worried she had too much riding on this first encounter. There would be plenty of time to try to manage her expectations on the long drive. The curtain by the door fell back into place, and Samantha came out of the house before he had made up his mind about honking on a Sunday morning.
He got out and walked around to open the car door for her, and then turned to greet her. There was still some awkward uncertainty so they shook hands and smiled through the tension and her nerves.
"Thank you again for offering to drive, please let me put gas in your car" she gushed.
Lucas sensed the urgency behind her request, a need to tip the balance back so she would not feel so indebted to him. He wanted to argue, but decided to let her have this one.
"You can do that."
He watched her visibly relax. She got in and he walked back to the driver's seat in measured slow steps, savoring a few more moments of solitude. She watched him make his way around so calmly, so gracefully and wondered whether he was ever caught off guard.
He punched an address into the navigation system, selected some classic rock radio station and then started the engine. She settled in, trying to slow her breathing and organize her thoughts.
"Will you tell me how you met Raven?"
Lucas smiled and said "I think you'll like that story, and it's as good a place as any to start. When I first arrived in West Harrington, I was a bit like a lost puppy and Raven scooped me up at a diner. She calls it like she sees it, no nonsense and she put me up on her couch for a few days until I could find a job and get my own place. I don't think anyone can usually refuse her, she just told me I was coming home with her and that was that. Thinking back, I liked her right away, but I'm not sure I could have told her no if I tried. Real business like in her tone, you know?" Lucas paused and flicked his eyes to Samantha's face to see her reaction. Samantha was drinking in every word. Lucas felt protective of her, she seemed so fragile. He wanted to prepare her for Raven's bluntness. "Raven saw something in me besides my need, and decided to rent me her spare room so I basically lived at her house for three months. I tried to help out around the house, and she put me to work fixing things, painting things and helping move furniture. People either love her and seek her out for readings or advice, or they shun her and avoid her. I wouldn't be surprised if some people think she's a witch or something, but there is no harm in her intention. Some folks just aren't too happy with things she sees either so they turn ugly on her sometimes, but she never lets that interfere with her delivery of information." Lucas paused again, and felt Samantha's gaze on the side of his face.
"What kinds of things does she see?"
"I think she'll be better at explaining or describing that than I could...so...can I ask you what you have seen? Besides the wolf thing I mean." He was careful in his tone, but also curious.
Samantha swallowed and then cast her mind back. "I've seen images in people's eyes, like once I saw a butterfly and another time I saw a snake coiled around some one's leg. Once I felt a deep sadness that was not my own, and while I was not sad, tears rolled down my face and my sad friend who could not cry felt some relief." She shook herself and came back to the present, the car, the conversation with Lucas.
They both felt a silence deepen between them as the radio filled the cabin with a well-known song. It was a comfortable silence that was only broken occasionally by a guitar solo or a rock ballad. At one point they both hummed along with a favorite and their voices mingled in a quiet way with the rumble of the engine, the song, and each other. Her anticipation of meeting Raven was calmer now, less anxious, but just as vibrant.
He got out and walked around to open the car door for her, and then turned to greet her. There was still some awkward uncertainty so they shook hands and smiled through the tension and her nerves.
"Thank you again for offering to drive, please let me put gas in your car" she gushed.
Lucas sensed the urgency behind her request, a need to tip the balance back so she would not feel so indebted to him. He wanted to argue, but decided to let her have this one.
"You can do that."
He watched her visibly relax. She got in and he walked back to the driver's seat in measured slow steps, savoring a few more moments of solitude. She watched him make his way around so calmly, so gracefully and wondered whether he was ever caught off guard.
He punched an address into the navigation system, selected some classic rock radio station and then started the engine. She settled in, trying to slow her breathing and organize her thoughts.
"Will you tell me how you met Raven?"
Lucas smiled and said "I think you'll like that story, and it's as good a place as any to start. When I first arrived in West Harrington, I was a bit like a lost puppy and Raven scooped me up at a diner. She calls it like she sees it, no nonsense and she put me up on her couch for a few days until I could find a job and get my own place. I don't think anyone can usually refuse her, she just told me I was coming home with her and that was that. Thinking back, I liked her right away, but I'm not sure I could have told her no if I tried. Real business like in her tone, you know?" Lucas paused and flicked his eyes to Samantha's face to see her reaction. Samantha was drinking in every word. Lucas felt protective of her, she seemed so fragile. He wanted to prepare her for Raven's bluntness. "Raven saw something in me besides my need, and decided to rent me her spare room so I basically lived at her house for three months. I tried to help out around the house, and she put me to work fixing things, painting things and helping move furniture. People either love her and seek her out for readings or advice, or they shun her and avoid her. I wouldn't be surprised if some people think she's a witch or something, but there is no harm in her intention. Some folks just aren't too happy with things she sees either so they turn ugly on her sometimes, but she never lets that interfere with her delivery of information." Lucas paused again, and felt Samantha's gaze on the side of his face.
"What kinds of things does she see?"
"I think she'll be better at explaining or describing that than I could...so...can I ask you what you have seen? Besides the wolf thing I mean." He was careful in his tone, but also curious.
Samantha swallowed and then cast her mind back. "I've seen images in people's eyes, like once I saw a butterfly and another time I saw a snake coiled around some one's leg. Once I felt a deep sadness that was not my own, and while I was not sad, tears rolled down my face and my sad friend who could not cry felt some relief." She shook herself and came back to the present, the car, the conversation with Lucas.
They both felt a silence deepen between them as the radio filled the cabin with a well-known song. It was a comfortable silence that was only broken occasionally by a guitar solo or a rock ballad. At one point they both hummed along with a favorite and their voices mingled in a quiet way with the rumble of the engine, the song, and each other. Her anticipation of meeting Raven was calmer now, less anxious, but just as vibrant.
Wednesday, April 16, 2014
Second Sight (the walk and talk)
They fell in step with Lucas unconsciously taking the side closer to the street, thus protecting Samantha from traffic, or who knows what all.
She was hyper sensitive to the unspoken conversation, but decided to ignore that for the moment. Keeping her eyes on the ground just a few paces ahead, she took a deep breath and dove in:
"I was hoping you could shed some light on these visions I sometimes have. You are the first person I've met who seemed to know on some level what it meant, and also it sort of seemed like you knew someone else who had this...ability..." she had let the words tumble out a bit like rapid fire, a habit of talking faster when she got nervous taking over. She took a sideways glance toward Lucas and saw his aspect had become thoughtful and he looked almost like he was reminiscing.
"I have met one other person with this skill, her name was Raven and I met her about three years ago. Come to think of it, she was very matter of fact with what she saw and shared openly with every person she encountered whether they were open minded and receptive or not. It was a little awkward even going to a restaurant with her because she would read whoever she came across without hesitating. Quite a few people rolled their eyes and wrote her off as nuts. She never seemed to mind, in fact it seemed to give her a sense of freedom to say whatever she saw."
Samantha could hear in his voice how much he liked and respected this Raven lady. A tiny flame of envy flared in her heart and mind as she couldn't help but wonder the exact nature of their relationship. She nodded, and found herself wondering how far away this lady was. Samantha didn't know whether or not she'd have the courage to go meet her knowing Raven might be able to read her, and yet the need to learn her craft to be able to interpret or control or even understand what it was had been buried until the possibility existed of answers. Now that the possibility had surfaced her need for guidance had awoken an insatiable thirst in her and she couldn't let it stay latent much longer.
"Does she live close by?"
"It's maybe a two hour drive, but I haven't seen her for about a year and a half."
Samantha hadn't realised she was holding her breath. Two hours away, someone lived ...someone who had Second Sight...someone who might be able to guide her. A wave of emotion stopped her in her tracks and Lucas walked three or four paces alone before realising she had stopped.
Lucas turned back, concern on his face. Samantha felt her color rise, and a tear slid down her right cheek. When had she started welling up, anyway? Lucas took a tentative step toward her and she tried to shake away her emotion.
"Sorry," she mumbled "I don't know where this is coming from..."
Lucas came by her side, and put his left arm around her, steering her toward a park bench.
They sat quietly, as Samantha's tears softly fell, leaving silent salt spots on her blouse.
After a while, she found her voice and he listened with his whole body, enjoying her authenticity, her smell, and finding an unexpected kinship as she described a profound loneliness with her strange visions. She described the fear the first time she saw things no one else saw. A fear of going insane, of being locked up, or having hallucinations. A fear of being strange or different, a fear of being isolated. This ability which could be a gift had also become a silent burden and a curse. He found himself drawing parrallels to his own affinity with wolves, how the blessing had also isolated him, but he didn't want to interrupt her as she shared her vulnerability. His heart went out to her, and he knew he wanted to introduce her to Raven soon. It was the first thing he told her into the long pause once he felt she had said all she intended to say, and he almost regretted it, because it brought a fresh fountain of tears, this time of gratitude.
When they stood to walk back toward the parking lot, he wanted to hug her, help comfort her, take care of her, protect her. They walked in silence side by side, and Samantha found a hopeful spring in her step she hadn't known was missing. She turned to him once they got to her car.
"I thought I was going to be able to help you!" Her eyes were wide with surprise. "I had no idea how much you would be able to help me. I didn't even know I needed help of any kind."
He grinned. "All in good time, I imagine...first things first. Let me try to contact Raven and see if I can track her down. Let's exchange phone numbers, so I can keep you posted."
Samantha fumbled in her purse for her phone, typed in his number and hit send so he would have her number too.
She looked up from underneath her lashes, feeling a little embarrassed about crying earlier.
"I'm glad we met at Moe's the other night!"
She wanted to hug him, but thrust her hand out for a handshake at the last second. He took her hand gently, no longer trembling, and pulled her closer. She held on in an awkward half handshake, half hug until they both broke away.
"So I guess I'll hear from you sometime about Raven..."
He nodded, and then turned to walk away.
She got in her car, shook her head, and glanced at herself in the rearview mirror. She had an ex-boyfriend who only ever told her how beautiful she was when she cried. At the time she resented him for saying it, but today she kind of hoped it was true, just a little bit.
She was hyper sensitive to the unspoken conversation, but decided to ignore that for the moment. Keeping her eyes on the ground just a few paces ahead, she took a deep breath and dove in:
"I was hoping you could shed some light on these visions I sometimes have. You are the first person I've met who seemed to know on some level what it meant, and also it sort of seemed like you knew someone else who had this...ability..." she had let the words tumble out a bit like rapid fire, a habit of talking faster when she got nervous taking over. She took a sideways glance toward Lucas and saw his aspect had become thoughtful and he looked almost like he was reminiscing.
"I have met one other person with this skill, her name was Raven and I met her about three years ago. Come to think of it, she was very matter of fact with what she saw and shared openly with every person she encountered whether they were open minded and receptive or not. It was a little awkward even going to a restaurant with her because she would read whoever she came across without hesitating. Quite a few people rolled their eyes and wrote her off as nuts. She never seemed to mind, in fact it seemed to give her a sense of freedom to say whatever she saw."
Samantha could hear in his voice how much he liked and respected this Raven lady. A tiny flame of envy flared in her heart and mind as she couldn't help but wonder the exact nature of their relationship. She nodded, and found herself wondering how far away this lady was. Samantha didn't know whether or not she'd have the courage to go meet her knowing Raven might be able to read her, and yet the need to learn her craft to be able to interpret or control or even understand what it was had been buried until the possibility existed of answers. Now that the possibility had surfaced her need for guidance had awoken an insatiable thirst in her and she couldn't let it stay latent much longer.
"Does she live close by?"
"It's maybe a two hour drive, but I haven't seen her for about a year and a half."
Samantha hadn't realised she was holding her breath. Two hours away, someone lived ...someone who had Second Sight...someone who might be able to guide her. A wave of emotion stopped her in her tracks and Lucas walked three or four paces alone before realising she had stopped.
Lucas turned back, concern on his face. Samantha felt her color rise, and a tear slid down her right cheek. When had she started welling up, anyway? Lucas took a tentative step toward her and she tried to shake away her emotion.
"Sorry," she mumbled "I don't know where this is coming from..."
Lucas came by her side, and put his left arm around her, steering her toward a park bench.
They sat quietly, as Samantha's tears softly fell, leaving silent salt spots on her blouse.
After a while, she found her voice and he listened with his whole body, enjoying her authenticity, her smell, and finding an unexpected kinship as she described a profound loneliness with her strange visions. She described the fear the first time she saw things no one else saw. A fear of going insane, of being locked up, or having hallucinations. A fear of being strange or different, a fear of being isolated. This ability which could be a gift had also become a silent burden and a curse. He found himself drawing parrallels to his own affinity with wolves, how the blessing had also isolated him, but he didn't want to interrupt her as she shared her vulnerability. His heart went out to her, and he knew he wanted to introduce her to Raven soon. It was the first thing he told her into the long pause once he felt she had said all she intended to say, and he almost regretted it, because it brought a fresh fountain of tears, this time of gratitude.
When they stood to walk back toward the parking lot, he wanted to hug her, help comfort her, take care of her, protect her. They walked in silence side by side, and Samantha found a hopeful spring in her step she hadn't known was missing. She turned to him once they got to her car.
"I thought I was going to be able to help you!" Her eyes were wide with surprise. "I had no idea how much you would be able to help me. I didn't even know I needed help of any kind."
He grinned. "All in good time, I imagine...first things first. Let me try to contact Raven and see if I can track her down. Let's exchange phone numbers, so I can keep you posted."
Samantha fumbled in her purse for her phone, typed in his number and hit send so he would have her number too.
She looked up from underneath her lashes, feeling a little embarrassed about crying earlier.
"I'm glad we met at Moe's the other night!"
She wanted to hug him, but thrust her hand out for a handshake at the last second. He took her hand gently, no longer trembling, and pulled her closer. She held on in an awkward half handshake, half hug until they both broke away.
"So I guess I'll hear from you sometime about Raven..."
He nodded, and then turned to walk away.
She got in her car, shook her head, and glanced at herself in the rearview mirror. She had an ex-boyfriend who only ever told her how beautiful she was when she cried. At the time she resented him for saying it, but today she kind of hoped it was true, just a little bit.
Tuesday, April 15, 2014
Second Sight (the meeting, Samantha)
Her mind tripping over itself, her heart pounding, her fingers cold, she put her car in park. He was just standing there, eyes intense, feet planted and she took a deep breath and a long blink.
She gathered her frayed nerves along with her purse, and got out of the car. As she walked toward him, her eyes slipped into Second Sight and she saw above his head a beam of light through dark gray clouds that weren't there in true weather. She glimpsed a troubled lonely past he just left behind. He bared his teeth and in her current view she saw a wolf with its tail between his hind legs, head ducked, tongue lolling to the side from exhaustion.
Her hand might tremble in his, but she felt safe with him, and her curiosity overcame her nerves.
He said 'Hi.'
He said so much more with his eyes, and she felt something uncoil inside her.
"How do you feel about taking a walk?" She was still keyed up and couldn't imagine sitting still.
'Good, yes let's'
She gathered her frayed nerves along with her purse, and got out of the car. As she walked toward him, her eyes slipped into Second Sight and she saw above his head a beam of light through dark gray clouds that weren't there in true weather. She glimpsed a troubled lonely past he just left behind. He bared his teeth and in her current view she saw a wolf with its tail between his hind legs, head ducked, tongue lolling to the side from exhaustion.
Her hand might tremble in his, but she felt safe with him, and her curiosity overcame her nerves.
He said 'Hi.'
He said so much more with his eyes, and she felt something uncoil inside her.
"How do you feel about taking a walk?" She was still keyed up and couldn't imagine sitting still.
'Good, yes let's'
Second Sight (the meeting, Lucas)
Lucas sat nervously on the curb, and schooled himself against looking at his watch again. He knew he was early. He wanted to be first, so he could set the tone, and also to get his bearing. He tried to slow his breathing and did a slow inhale to a count of five and a slow exhale to a count of five. He thought back to his days living with Anand who had taught him so many things, including this breathing trick. It always seemed to work and today was no exception. The summer of joy, and Lucas hoped to return and revisit the peaceful home of Anand one day. He heard a car approaching the parking lot and his heart went into hyper-drive once again. He stood up, trying to appear relaxed, and felt his heart drop as he saw that it wasn't her in the driver's seat. He decided sitting wasn't working, and looked at his watch again. 11:52. Torture. Being here first was supposed to give him the upper hand, but waiting was driving him a little nuts.
She pulled into the parking lot six minutes later.
He felt himself standing as though his feet were mired in eight inches of mud, and reminded himself to smile. He wasn't sure if baring his teeth in a grimace would serve well enough as a smile or not, but it was all he could muster at the moment. He waited as she stepped out of her car, and felt frozen in place. Her smile and the kindness in her eyes had a calming effect and he shook himself free, stretched out his hand and said hi.
He wasn't sure, but he thought he felt her hand tremble as he shook it, and somehow her nerves calmed his. He swept his gaze once around the parking lot and was a little surprised that she had triggered some protective instinct in himself. He knew she was nervous about meeting him today, but something inside his blood made him feel like keeping her safe was now his priority on some primitive level.
He liked her smell.
He trusted her, and he didn't know why...but now it didn't matter anymore.
She pulled into the parking lot six minutes later.
He felt himself standing as though his feet were mired in eight inches of mud, and reminded himself to smile. He wasn't sure if baring his teeth in a grimace would serve well enough as a smile or not, but it was all he could muster at the moment. He waited as she stepped out of her car, and felt frozen in place. Her smile and the kindness in her eyes had a calming effect and he shook himself free, stretched out his hand and said hi.
He wasn't sure, but he thought he felt her hand tremble as he shook it, and somehow her nerves calmed his. He swept his gaze once around the parking lot and was a little surprised that she had triggered some protective instinct in himself. He knew she was nervous about meeting him today, but something inside his blood made him feel like keeping her safe was now his priority on some primitive level.
He liked her smell.
He trusted her, and he didn't know why...but now it didn't matter anymore.
Sunday, April 13, 2014
Second Sight (Samantha continued)
Samantha tried hard to focus, and found work a welcome distraction from her meeting with Lucas looming in her mind as tomorrow drew near. She's not the big cheese, but she is kind of important without going into the dreary details. Her day is spent deflecting, delegating, finding solutions, making connections and she is often drained at the end of the day, though she does find satisfaction knowing she has helped...someone...
She has to be reminded to come up for air at lunch, and she spends a few minutes taking a walk outside which does two things; it gives her a much needed reprieve, a chance to clear her head, and as a result, a chance to remember about Lucas. Her stomach does an unexpected flip at the thought, and she remembers why she didn't want to come up for air after all.
Tomorrow.
She's not sure whether she would be more nervous about actually getting answers about her little vision trick, or more nervous if she was meeting Lucas for the simple reason of getting to know him.
Perhaps they are inextricably entwined at this point, so she shrugs to herself.
The afternoon seems to slow to a snail's pace as she keeps glancing at the clock, noting each time that a mere ten minutes had passed when it had felt like an hour. One foot in front of the other. By the time five o'clock actually arrived she was exhausted. Any thought she might have had about going to the gym flew out of her mind with a heavy sigh. All she could think about was getting home.
She slogged to her car, and poured herself in, feeling wiped. She sat for a minute behind the wheel, trying to become alert before trying to tackle Friday rush hour. It galled her that a drive that would take 20 minutes at 10 pm would probably take her more than an hour now.
She decided to throw on a CD for the drive, a mix of up-beat music that she could sing to if she got tired.
When she got home, she popped a bag of popcorn for dinner, and plopped in front of the tv.
She knew she was avoiding the question about what to set up for tomorrow around 1 pm. Part of her knew though, that she would rather leave it open ended...
She has to be reminded to come up for air at lunch, and she spends a few minutes taking a walk outside which does two things; it gives her a much needed reprieve, a chance to clear her head, and as a result, a chance to remember about Lucas. Her stomach does an unexpected flip at the thought, and she remembers why she didn't want to come up for air after all.
Tomorrow.
She's not sure whether she would be more nervous about actually getting answers about her little vision trick, or more nervous if she was meeting Lucas for the simple reason of getting to know him.
Perhaps they are inextricably entwined at this point, so she shrugs to herself.
The afternoon seems to slow to a snail's pace as she keeps glancing at the clock, noting each time that a mere ten minutes had passed when it had felt like an hour. One foot in front of the other. By the time five o'clock actually arrived she was exhausted. Any thought she might have had about going to the gym flew out of her mind with a heavy sigh. All she could think about was getting home.
She slogged to her car, and poured herself in, feeling wiped. She sat for a minute behind the wheel, trying to become alert before trying to tackle Friday rush hour. It galled her that a drive that would take 20 minutes at 10 pm would probably take her more than an hour now.
She decided to throw on a CD for the drive, a mix of up-beat music that she could sing to if she got tired.
When she got home, she popped a bag of popcorn for dinner, and plopped in front of the tv.
She knew she was avoiding the question about what to set up for tomorrow around 1 pm. Part of her knew though, that she would rather leave it open ended...
Sunday, April 6, 2014
Second Sight (Samantha on her way to work)
Friday:
6:05 AM
Hit snooze.
6:15 AM
Roll over and hit snooze one more time.
6:25 AM
Eyes blinking awake, Samantha grimaces, cringing inwardly at the day ahead, and cheering the fact that it's Friday anyway. Then it all comes tumbling back in vivid recall and she sits bolt upright, as one prominent image is unshakable: a wolf.
6:27 AM
She starts the shower water, waits for it to heat up and chews the inside of her cheek. Noon tomorrow. What was she thinking, agreeing to meet up with a total stranger?
6:42 AM
She has dressed, run a brush through her hair and is impatiently waiting by the coffee pot. Should she cancel? How would she? She didn't get his phone number or anything. She would never just not show up...damn integrity...but of course if she stood him up it would make running into him so much worse...fine, she resolved. We'll meet at noon, have the quickest cup of coffee known to man and then dash.
7:03 AM
Bagel in hand, she set her coffee to go cup in the cup holder of her car, and got ready for her hour long commute. She wondered how she could arrange for this meeting tomorrow to be short, and wracked her imagination for plausible Saturday obligations or engagements to tell Lucas. She started her car and then sighed, remembering belatedly that she needed to put gas in the car. She was going to be at least 10 minutes late. She debated calling to let someone know, but then decided to wait and see how long the line was at the pump.
7:14 AM
Three cars deep, she gave a quick call to the office, expecting to leave a message. To her surprise, Gina picked up. "Hi Gina, I didn't expect you to pick up! It's Sam, I'm running about ten or fifteen minutes behind." Gina chuckled and said "No problem, I'll let them know to start the meeting topics you don't need to run first." "Thanks, hon. Now let's hope traffic isn't worse than usual..."
7:43 AM
Gridlock, but so far no more than usual. She was still distracted. Should she pretend she has a date? Tickets to a matinee, hmm...she wondered what was playing at the local community theater. Should she actually get tickets? She chewed on her bagel. A tiny voice in her mind started asking her an uncomfortable series of questions.
What if you're enjoying the talk, and maybe he can shed light on these visions you've been having since puberty?
What are you afraid of?
Well, admit it, you think he's ruggedly handsome...when was the last time you went on a date anyway?
She shoved the questions away, determined to focus on getting to work in one piece and finishing the week strong at work. Besides, it wasn't a date -- was it?
8:07 AM
She was grateful once more to have an assigned parking spot, and she raced into the building in a flurry of apologies, diving into her office role full tilt.
6:05 AM
Hit snooze.
6:15 AM
Roll over and hit snooze one more time.
6:25 AM
Eyes blinking awake, Samantha grimaces, cringing inwardly at the day ahead, and cheering the fact that it's Friday anyway. Then it all comes tumbling back in vivid recall and she sits bolt upright, as one prominent image is unshakable: a wolf.
6:27 AM
She starts the shower water, waits for it to heat up and chews the inside of her cheek. Noon tomorrow. What was she thinking, agreeing to meet up with a total stranger?
6:42 AM
She has dressed, run a brush through her hair and is impatiently waiting by the coffee pot. Should she cancel? How would she? She didn't get his phone number or anything. She would never just not show up...damn integrity...but of course if she stood him up it would make running into him so much worse...fine, she resolved. We'll meet at noon, have the quickest cup of coffee known to man and then dash.
7:03 AM
Bagel in hand, she set her coffee to go cup in the cup holder of her car, and got ready for her hour long commute. She wondered how she could arrange for this meeting tomorrow to be short, and wracked her imagination for plausible Saturday obligations or engagements to tell Lucas. She started her car and then sighed, remembering belatedly that she needed to put gas in the car. She was going to be at least 10 minutes late. She debated calling to let someone know, but then decided to wait and see how long the line was at the pump.
7:14 AM
Three cars deep, she gave a quick call to the office, expecting to leave a message. To her surprise, Gina picked up. "Hi Gina, I didn't expect you to pick up! It's Sam, I'm running about ten or fifteen minutes behind." Gina chuckled and said "No problem, I'll let them know to start the meeting topics you don't need to run first." "Thanks, hon. Now let's hope traffic isn't worse than usual..."
7:43 AM
Gridlock, but so far no more than usual. She was still distracted. Should she pretend she has a date? Tickets to a matinee, hmm...she wondered what was playing at the local community theater. Should she actually get tickets? She chewed on her bagel. A tiny voice in her mind started asking her an uncomfortable series of questions.
What if you're enjoying the talk, and maybe he can shed light on these visions you've been having since puberty?
What are you afraid of?
Well, admit it, you think he's ruggedly handsome...when was the last time you went on a date anyway?
She shoved the questions away, determined to focus on getting to work in one piece and finishing the week strong at work. Besides, it wasn't a date -- was it?
8:07 AM
She was grateful once more to have an assigned parking spot, and she raced into the building in a flurry of apologies, diving into her office role full tilt.
Friday, April 4, 2014
Second Sight (Lucas)
Lucas was trying to start fresh here in this new town, and he couldn't have someone interfering with his efforts. Not already. Samantha seemed sweet somehow, but he couldn't afford to trust a total stranger.
He fidgeted with his napkin and stared at her again, unaware that each time he did her voice tapered off.
She was pretty, or maybe cute was a better word...but he couldn't let himself lose focus. She had asked him point blank about wolves. How could she have known?
He was inclined to believe her about the visions, he had heard of someone like that back three homes ago. Inwardly he cringed.
Would he be doomed for his whole life to be nomadic?
In some wilder moments he enjoyed his freedom, but sometimes he yearned for a pack life he had no memory of. A loner, but not by preference.
He saw fear and concern mingled in Samantha's eyes, but he didn't know what to say anymore.
"Wolves are my spirit animal," he said gruffly. "They are a major guiding force in my philosophy of life and I have always been drawn to wolves." He cleared his throat and saw she only waited patiently for him to continue. "In most ways, it's the biggest blessing. But when wolves are drawn to me in real life, sometimes it causes...trouble...for me."
Samantha blinked and then a small smile crept over her face starting in her eyes.
"This is extraordinary. This may be the first time in my life that a vision is explained to me!" She sounded almost giddy, though she was clearly trying to contain herself. "I have so many questions, but I don't even know where to start."
Lucas was a little surprised, not only because she took the wolf thing in stride, but also because she seemed so happy.
She became quiet and thoughtful.
Lucas was worried she was sorting through a litany of questions to ask him so he seized the moment. "It was nice to meet you, Samantha, was it? I hope to run into you again soon..."
She was dismayed.
"Wait, can't we talk more? I mean we barely scratched the surface..." his eyes were boring into hers again, with that worry crease etched in his forehead.
Lucas awkwardly thrust out his hand across the table in an effort to close the conversation. Samantha stared down at his hand for a moment. Then she finished her martini and fished the last olive out since it had fallen off the toothpick.
She somehow wanted to extend her conversation with this wolf-man, but was at a loss as to how.
As she sat, she heard him say "Are you available this weekend?"
Lucas looked almost as surprised to find himself saying that as she was to hear it, but she was pleased, and the color rose in her cheeks as she nodded.
She took his hand which was still outstretched, shaking it felt funny.
"Shall we meet here?" It sounded lame, as soon as she said it she wished she could retract it. To her surprise he seemed relieved at the suggestion.
"Yes, how's noon on Saturday?"
"Ok."
Samantha stood up unsure whether she was a bit tipsy or in a daze from the conversation or the second sight, but she drifted out to her car slowly wondering why it was still only Thursday...
He fidgeted with his napkin and stared at her again, unaware that each time he did her voice tapered off.
She was pretty, or maybe cute was a better word...but he couldn't let himself lose focus. She had asked him point blank about wolves. How could she have known?
He was inclined to believe her about the visions, he had heard of someone like that back three homes ago. Inwardly he cringed.
Would he be doomed for his whole life to be nomadic?
In some wilder moments he enjoyed his freedom, but sometimes he yearned for a pack life he had no memory of. A loner, but not by preference.
He saw fear and concern mingled in Samantha's eyes, but he didn't know what to say anymore.
"Wolves are my spirit animal," he said gruffly. "They are a major guiding force in my philosophy of life and I have always been drawn to wolves." He cleared his throat and saw she only waited patiently for him to continue. "In most ways, it's the biggest blessing. But when wolves are drawn to me in real life, sometimes it causes...trouble...for me."
Samantha blinked and then a small smile crept over her face starting in her eyes.
"This is extraordinary. This may be the first time in my life that a vision is explained to me!" She sounded almost giddy, though she was clearly trying to contain herself. "I have so many questions, but I don't even know where to start."
Lucas was a little surprised, not only because she took the wolf thing in stride, but also because she seemed so happy.
She became quiet and thoughtful.
Lucas was worried she was sorting through a litany of questions to ask him so he seized the moment. "It was nice to meet you, Samantha, was it? I hope to run into you again soon..."
She was dismayed.
"Wait, can't we talk more? I mean we barely scratched the surface..." his eyes were boring into hers again, with that worry crease etched in his forehead.
Lucas awkwardly thrust out his hand across the table in an effort to close the conversation. Samantha stared down at his hand for a moment. Then she finished her martini and fished the last olive out since it had fallen off the toothpick.
She somehow wanted to extend her conversation with this wolf-man, but was at a loss as to how.
As she sat, she heard him say "Are you available this weekend?"
Lucas looked almost as surprised to find himself saying that as she was to hear it, but she was pleased, and the color rose in her cheeks as she nodded.
She took his hand which was still outstretched, shaking it felt funny.
"Shall we meet here?" It sounded lame, as soon as she said it she wished she could retract it. To her surprise he seemed relieved at the suggestion.
"Yes, how's noon on Saturday?"
"Ok."
Samantha stood up unsure whether she was a bit tipsy or in a daze from the conversation or the second sight, but she drifted out to her car slowly wondering why it was still only Thursday...
Thursday, April 3, 2014
Second Sight (Part the First)
She sauntered into the dimly lit lounge feeling listless after her whirlwind day at work and caught the bartender's eye. It was relatively quiet, and with a simple nod she knew Moe would bring her the usual slightly dirty vodka martini with extra olives. She waited patiently while he shook up her drink thoroughly so that there would be tiny shards of ice. Her mouth watered at the thought of the olive she would bite into first and she licked her lips in anticipation.
"Keepin' the tab open tonight, hon?" Moe's question floated across the bar above the jazz song playing softly.
"Can't tonight, Moe. I have another crazy day tomorrow so it'll be just the one this time."
Moe shrugged noncommittally as she handed him her card to run.
She scanned the room with First Sight and took a sip of her drink. Then she allowed her eyes to unfocus and slowly tracked the room with Second Sight. She couldn't remember when it had first begun, but now she found herself using it unconsciously to gather more and more information about her surroundings. Sometimes Second Sight showed her odd things about people or left trails around things. She couldn't always interpret the meaning of what she saw either.
Tonight her eyes found a shimmer hovering above the man sitting at the other end of the bar, turned half way in his seat so he could watch the game on one television and still chat with Moe.
Moe startled her out of her musings by handing her the bill and her card, so she asked him
"Hey Moe, who is your new friend?"
"That's Lucas, he's kinda new in town...want me to introduce you?"
"Uh, you know I've had a long day..." she trailed off.
Moe decided for her; "Hey Luke, c'mere and let me introduce you to one of my regulars. Samantha, this is Lucas, Lucas, Samantha..."
As they shook hands, their eyes locked and she slipped into Second Sight again. This time she couldn't deny seeing far more than a mere shimmer. Her eyes force-focused into a startling image of a lone wolf. Though she could see his ferocity, there was also contentment and good nature there.
"N-n-nice to meet you," she managed and she shook her head and refocused her eyes.
"What just happened?" He asked, trying to catch her gaze again as he pulled up his barstool.
How could she explain to him that she saw his wolfish nature in the actual form of a wolf, with its tongue lolling out of the side of its mouth?
More importantly, how had he noticed that anything was different about her greeting?
She shook her head and said "I'm not sure...I've had kind of a crazy day."
"Do you want to talk about it?" He seemed genuinely interested.
She laughed and took another sip of her drink.
"Not really." She felt a little nervous. Something about his candor made her feel quite sure if she started talking she'd want to tell him the absolute truth. "Are you a big sports fan?" she asked, indicating the tv.
It was his turn to laugh.
"My buddy bet me lunch on this game so I'm only watching to see if he owes me. Otherwise I'd probably never keep up with any games."
His grin was reminiscent for a moment of that wolf again and she ducked her head to concentrate on eating her olive.
Why did she have to see weird shit? Why couldn't the meaning at least be more clear?
She felt him looking at her and felt herself blush.
Out of nowhere she heard herself ask him "Do you like wolves?"
He started and then turned his full attention on her, forgetting his bet, the game, his drink and Moe.
His eyes burned into hers and he asked her in a low voice "What have you heard? Who are you?"
For a moment she felt threatened, but she felt her eyes slip into Second Sight again and in his countenance she saw fear like a cornered animal and her heart melted a little.
"I haven't heard anything, I promise" she said and returned his gaze. "Perhaps we could talk somewhere a little more privately?" She gestured toward a nearby booth and she saw his shoulders relax a smidgen.
He followed her stiffly and slid into the bench across from her.
She allowed herself a moment to take in his scruffy sandy brown hair, his unshaven beard and the crease in his forehead worn in place by worry. Handsome in a wild and rugged sort of way, Lucas looked to be in his early 30's.
"What do you know about me?" He hissed tensely across the table.
How could she just come right out and tell him about Second Sight? And why should he believe her, anyway? Half the time she didn't believe it herself...
"I sometimes get these visions...or flashes...I must sound crazy to you. I don't usually even know what it means, so most of the time I just keep it to myself. I'm not sure what even made me ask you..."
His frown deepened as she talked and she trailed off again. He looked fearsome in her First Sight, but fear-full in her Second Sight and she was torn between her instinct to shut up and protect herself and her instinct to reach out to him and comfort him.
"Keepin' the tab open tonight, hon?" Moe's question floated across the bar above the jazz song playing softly.
"Can't tonight, Moe. I have another crazy day tomorrow so it'll be just the one this time."
Moe shrugged noncommittally as she handed him her card to run.
She scanned the room with First Sight and took a sip of her drink. Then she allowed her eyes to unfocus and slowly tracked the room with Second Sight. She couldn't remember when it had first begun, but now she found herself using it unconsciously to gather more and more information about her surroundings. Sometimes Second Sight showed her odd things about people or left trails around things. She couldn't always interpret the meaning of what she saw either.
Tonight her eyes found a shimmer hovering above the man sitting at the other end of the bar, turned half way in his seat so he could watch the game on one television and still chat with Moe.
Moe startled her out of her musings by handing her the bill and her card, so she asked him
"Hey Moe, who is your new friend?"
"That's Lucas, he's kinda new in town...want me to introduce you?"
"Uh, you know I've had a long day..." she trailed off.
Moe decided for her; "Hey Luke, c'mere and let me introduce you to one of my regulars. Samantha, this is Lucas, Lucas, Samantha..."
As they shook hands, their eyes locked and she slipped into Second Sight again. This time she couldn't deny seeing far more than a mere shimmer. Her eyes force-focused into a startling image of a lone wolf. Though she could see his ferocity, there was also contentment and good nature there.
"N-n-nice to meet you," she managed and she shook her head and refocused her eyes.
"What just happened?" He asked, trying to catch her gaze again as he pulled up his barstool.
How could she explain to him that she saw his wolfish nature in the actual form of a wolf, with its tongue lolling out of the side of its mouth?
More importantly, how had he noticed that anything was different about her greeting?
She shook her head and said "I'm not sure...I've had kind of a crazy day."
"Do you want to talk about it?" He seemed genuinely interested.
She laughed and took another sip of her drink.
"Not really." She felt a little nervous. Something about his candor made her feel quite sure if she started talking she'd want to tell him the absolute truth. "Are you a big sports fan?" she asked, indicating the tv.
It was his turn to laugh.
"My buddy bet me lunch on this game so I'm only watching to see if he owes me. Otherwise I'd probably never keep up with any games."
His grin was reminiscent for a moment of that wolf again and she ducked her head to concentrate on eating her olive.
Why did she have to see weird shit? Why couldn't the meaning at least be more clear?
She felt him looking at her and felt herself blush.
Out of nowhere she heard herself ask him "Do you like wolves?"
He started and then turned his full attention on her, forgetting his bet, the game, his drink and Moe.
His eyes burned into hers and he asked her in a low voice "What have you heard? Who are you?"
For a moment she felt threatened, but she felt her eyes slip into Second Sight again and in his countenance she saw fear like a cornered animal and her heart melted a little.
"I haven't heard anything, I promise" she said and returned his gaze. "Perhaps we could talk somewhere a little more privately?" She gestured toward a nearby booth and she saw his shoulders relax a smidgen.
He followed her stiffly and slid into the bench across from her.
She allowed herself a moment to take in his scruffy sandy brown hair, his unshaven beard and the crease in his forehead worn in place by worry. Handsome in a wild and rugged sort of way, Lucas looked to be in his early 30's.
"What do you know about me?" He hissed tensely across the table.
How could she just come right out and tell him about Second Sight? And why should he believe her, anyway? Half the time she didn't believe it herself...
"I sometimes get these visions...or flashes...I must sound crazy to you. I don't usually even know what it means, so most of the time I just keep it to myself. I'm not sure what even made me ask you..."
His frown deepened as she talked and she trailed off again. He looked fearsome in her First Sight, but fear-full in her Second Sight and she was torn between her instinct to shut up and protect herself and her instinct to reach out to him and comfort him.
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