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The Double Meaning behind the blog title 'Dream Follower:'
First, for 14 years I was a ballroom & social dance instructor, and have studied both leading and following. I feel that learning to follow is full of nuance and is often misunderstood. I made it one of my personal goals to become a really excellent follow on the dance floor, and will probably talk a lot about the art of following - both in and out of the context of dance.

Second, I am a huge fan of author Michael Ende, probably best known for The Neverending Story. The book is incredible, and the first film captured some of the essence. (Please don't watch the other two films...I urge you to read the book though!) Anyway, at least twice in my life I have been caught in a storm of my own indecision, and my inner Moon Princess yelled to my inner Bastian...'Why don't you do what you dream?' I tear up even now as I write this little blurb. The tension between being practical, keeping my feet on the ground and my head out of the clouds (at the risk of compromising my inner vibrancy, true self, and who knows what else)...and reaching for my true dreams (at the risk of losing everything) is still a very real struggle. In fact, one of those struggles lead to my 14 years of teaching dance, so we can see which voice won the battle that fateful day when I was staring at the want-ad...

And so I strive to be two kinds of Dream Followers in my life. One has to do with connecting with others, and the other has to do with connecting with my inner Moon Princess and the world of possibility that opens when I do...

Monday, April 21, 2014

Adrenaline Junkie?

Ok, maybe not. I mean I hate roller coasters. I don't think I'll ever bungee jump.

But in the morning sometimes I stay in bed, full bladder, reading or browsing internets until I think I might burst and then make a mad dash for the bathroom.

And I make a sport of delaying the inevitable, racing the clock to see how fast I can shower and choose an outfit and hit the road.

I think procrastinating may be one of those adrenaline things. I get a sort of satisfaction approaching pride in being able to pull "it" off, against all odds. I'm that good. Most of the time no one but me can be impressed at my antics, because I have become clever enough to hide the close calls from the public eye. My failures are conveniently private. My celebrations are also by necessity private.

Here I am, typing this post. It means my morning routine will have a flurried frenzied slam dunk in a fifteen minute window rather than a lazy leisurely half hour. It means I may not have time to stop for coffee...or do I dare? Do I push the envelope? Do I drive 72 mph instead of 70 so that I can squeeze 5 more minutes in for coffee? Am I just trying to suck the marrow out of life? My private self-induced rush could easily be shifted into a full hour of primping if I enjoyed that sort of thing. But I enjoy the mad dash. I'm impressed with myself. I like being a wash and go girl letting my curls air dry, or slicking my hair into a bun. I don't enjoy make up, I guess I would rather someone like me for me than for some feature enhancing smokey eye-liner.

I guess it's about control. Which is why I can be an adrenaline junkie that hates roller coasters. I take calculated risks on my terms. I don't mind winning privately.

2 comments:

  1. The easiest way to get me out of bed on time is to make an appointment for me to bungee jump.
    As for coffee, I'm more than happy to be five minutes late, or add five minutes to my lateness, to grab a cup on the way in.

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