Lucas sat nervously on the curb, and schooled himself against looking at his watch again. He knew he was early. He wanted to be first, so he could set the tone, and also to get his bearing. He tried to slow his breathing and did a slow inhale to a count of five and a slow exhale to a count of five. He thought back to his days living with Anand who had taught him so many things, including this breathing trick. It always seemed to work and today was no exception. The summer of joy, and Lucas hoped to return and revisit the peaceful home of Anand one day. He heard a car approaching the parking lot and his heart went into hyper-drive once again. He stood up, trying to appear relaxed, and felt his heart drop as he saw that it wasn't her in the driver's seat. He decided sitting wasn't working, and looked at his watch again. 11:52. Torture. Being here first was supposed to give him the upper hand, but waiting was driving him a little nuts.
She pulled into the parking lot six minutes later.
He felt himself standing as though his feet were mired in eight inches of mud, and reminded himself to smile. He wasn't sure if baring his teeth in a grimace would serve well enough as a smile or not, but it was all he could muster at the moment. He waited as she stepped out of her car, and felt frozen in place. Her smile and the kindness in her eyes had a calming effect and he shook himself free, stretched out his hand and said hi.
He wasn't sure, but he thought he felt her hand tremble as he shook it, and somehow her nerves calmed his. He swept his gaze once around the parking lot and was a little surprised that she had triggered some protective instinct in himself. He knew she was nervous about meeting him today, but something inside his blood made him feel like keeping her safe was now his priority on some primitive level.
He liked her smell.
He trusted her, and he didn't know why...but now it didn't matter anymore.
Thank you for visiting!
The Double Meaning behind the blog title 'Dream Follower:'
First, for 14 years I was a ballroom & social dance instructor, and have studied both leading and following. I feel that learning to follow is full of nuance and is often misunderstood. I made it one of my personal goals to become a really excellent follow on the dance floor, and will probably talk a lot about the art of following - both in and out of the context of dance.
Second, I am a huge fan of author Michael Ende, probably best known for The Neverending Story. The book is incredible, and the first film captured some of the essence. (Please don't watch the other two films...I urge you to read the book though!) Anyway, at least twice in my life I have been caught in a storm of my own indecision, and my inner Moon Princess yelled to my inner Bastian...'Why don't you do what you dream?' I tear up even now as I write this little blurb. The tension between being practical, keeping my feet on the ground and my head out of the clouds (at the risk of compromising my inner vibrancy, true self, and who knows what else)...and reaching for my true dreams (at the risk of losing everything) is still a very real struggle. In fact, one of those struggles lead to my 14 years of teaching dance, so we can see which voice won the battle that fateful day when I was staring at the want-ad...
And so I strive to be two kinds of Dream Followers in my life. One has to do with connecting with others, and the other has to do with connecting with my inner Moon Princess and the world of possibility that opens when I do...