Samantha tried hard to focus, and found work a welcome distraction from her meeting with Lucas looming in her mind as tomorrow drew near. She's not the big cheese, but she is kind of important without going into the dreary details. Her day is spent deflecting, delegating, finding solutions, making connections and she is often drained at the end of the day, though she does find satisfaction knowing she has helped...someone...
She has to be reminded to come up for air at lunch, and she spends a few minutes taking a walk outside which does two things; it gives her a much needed reprieve, a chance to clear her head, and as a result, a chance to remember about Lucas. Her stomach does an unexpected flip at the thought, and she remembers why she didn't want to come up for air after all.
Tomorrow.
She's not sure whether she would be more nervous about actually getting answers about her little vision trick, or more nervous if she was meeting Lucas for the simple reason of getting to know him.
Perhaps they are inextricably entwined at this point, so she shrugs to herself.
The afternoon seems to slow to a snail's pace as she keeps glancing at the clock, noting each time that a mere ten minutes had passed when it had felt like an hour. One foot in front of the other. By the time five o'clock actually arrived she was exhausted. Any thought she might have had about going to the gym flew out of her mind with a heavy sigh. All she could think about was getting home.
She slogged to her car, and poured herself in, feeling wiped. She sat for a minute behind the wheel, trying to become alert before trying to tackle Friday rush hour. It galled her that a drive that would take 20 minutes at 10 pm would probably take her more than an hour now.
She decided to throw on a CD for the drive, a mix of up-beat music that she could sing to if she got tired.
When she got home, she popped a bag of popcorn for dinner, and plopped in front of the tv.
She knew she was avoiding the question about what to set up for tomorrow around 1 pm. Part of her knew though, that she would rather leave it open ended...
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The Double Meaning behind the blog title 'Dream Follower:'
First, for 14 years I was a ballroom & social dance instructor, and have studied both leading and following. I feel that learning to follow is full of nuance and is often misunderstood. I made it one of my personal goals to become a really excellent follow on the dance floor, and will probably talk a lot about the art of following - both in and out of the context of dance.
Second, I am a huge fan of author Michael Ende, probably best known for The Neverending Story. The book is incredible, and the first film captured some of the essence. (Please don't watch the other two films...I urge you to read the book though!) Anyway, at least twice in my life I have been caught in a storm of my own indecision, and my inner Moon Princess yelled to my inner Bastian...'Why don't you do what you dream?' I tear up even now as I write this little blurb. The tension between being practical, keeping my feet on the ground and my head out of the clouds (at the risk of compromising my inner vibrancy, true self, and who knows what else)...and reaching for my true dreams (at the risk of losing everything) is still a very real struggle. In fact, one of those struggles lead to my 14 years of teaching dance, so we can see which voice won the battle that fateful day when I was staring at the want-ad...
And so I strive to be two kinds of Dream Followers in my life. One has to do with connecting with others, and the other has to do with connecting with my inner Moon Princess and the world of possibility that opens when I do...
Sunday, April 13, 2014
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Besides, we all know what the universe usually does with our plans.
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